End of Year thoughts

I have feelings of blah over the end of this year. Maybe if they are let out, they won't bother me as much and I can live life without so much worrying about the end of everything. Lately that's all that I've been seeing and thinking about. Looking at my parents and seeing that I have so little time, that they'll be 60 when I'm 40, that 1 day they won't be there. Or looking at my nephews and knowing that I won't be there for them 1 day.
Maybe it's just the blah I usually get towards the Christmas season, thinking about the eventual end of all of the excitement that built up over the last 2 months dying in much the same way as a bottle rocket that brings in the new year.
Maybe it's because I have this bad feeling that somebody in my family is about to die or after having feeling my grandma at Samhain. That feeling of fear over the fact that things must change, it's impossible to stay the same.
Maybe it's because I feel like I haven't done anything major with my life. I want to change the world, as does just about everybody else, I'm sure. But I feel no closer to that then most other goals in my life. Another year goes by and I wonder how few people would show up at my funeral should I die tomorrow or even how many people look at this blog.
Maybe it's because I don't have anybody to place my feelings onto, somebody that causes me to look forward to the next year with them or even the next day just to see them. To those who have this, be glad and hug and kiss the person every chance you can. Consider them the treasure that they truly are.
I feel better



Hope everybody had a happy thanksgiving and managed to avoid the mass chaos of the day after. I had a pretty good weekend hanging out with nephews and baking. I got a tattoo...kinda. It's only partially done right now. I'm going to get it finished in about 2 or 3 weeks. My bro is taking it slow so that he doesn't get tired and mess up. It's the most detailed tattoo he's done thus far. I'll post a pic as soon as it's done.


Bad days and wonderful nights

I don't know how long I can last in this job anymore. I think I'll quit right after Christmas. They wrote up my whole Friday shift because thing weren't properly prepped, but I know I had many things prepped. I don't get why they didn't write up all the employees, but they want to set an example with my shift, so that's how it's going to be. It just seems so wrong. And to top it all off, they told me this on my mom's b-day, which I worked on. They never say when people are doing well, or thank people when they stay late, or ask the high schoolers how they're doing in class and congratulate them for working and doing well in their classes. They never have a meeting just to say that everybody is doing great. I'd understand some big place where the shifts never really see each other, but everybody knows everybody here and has worked with everybody for a few minutes. I don't know, maybe it just proves that I shouldn't run a business. Well as the title says, days are crap, but the nights tend to be beautiful.
Yesterday was the best night since tnt nights and antiprom. D.J. And I hung out at the riverwalk on the Columbus side, then decided to feed the curiosity over what was on the Alabama side by going over there. We walked all the way to the amphitheatre and onto the stage to perform an impromptu show for the unseen that happened to be there. We tried a couple of different takes before figuring out the right form and running with it for an hour. Then we went to IHOP and had pancakes, then to a park to play on the swings, then we just drove around. All totaled. I was awake yesterday for 24 hours. It was great. Must do it again sometime.
whoa-this has been the most updates in a really long time.


Restlessness settles in way too soon

Yesterday, I sat next to my parents for a total of 20 minutes, in two halves. They sent me out to the store almost as soon as I came in. Today I've spent maybe half an hour including dinner actually saying anything to them. I spent more time with them during the weekend while living in Statesboro then in any two weeks now. Or it seems that way. What's my point to all of this? It's time to go, I've stayed long enough and this isn't my home anymore. I would've been happier going to the same place everybody else went to instead of GS. Somehow, it makes me feel better to say this and not let it rot in my mind. Not like it matters, nobody reads this, so I can say whatever the hell I want.


Don't even hint the "F"word to me!!!

It all started when I was about to get off of work today. A couple came and and used the restroom, together! (strike 1) They then came out and acted like they wanted to buy something, but complained about the prices and the nutritional aspect of eating treats found in any coffee shop across America. The husband left, but the lady stayed and said that we(meaning the owner) need to get some lowfat items in the case because the only thing she could eat was a lettuce leaf belonging to one of our sample sandwiches. The other workers and I had a brief chuckle at this, mostly because we thought she was kidding around. But no, she went off going on about her high blood pressure and medication(strike 2). Then she looked at me and said, "I'm not picking on you, but woman to woman you need to lose some of that weight." (strike 3!)She was about to go on, but one look in my eyes and the way I gripped the meager fake wooden door that separated us made her stop and say bye. Oh...I almost quit my job just to punch her, but no I clenched my jaw and glared at her, as she left and even as she got in her car. For those who don't know, I'm proud of the fact that I've gone down several pants sizes(almost a 22 down to 16), but this woman just assumed that I was fat and didn't care about my health. It ruined the day I had then, but I just want to say to her if she should happen to look upon this page one miraculous day: fuck you! I have no plans or desire to have some nursing home attendant change my diaper because I happen to live to a 100 or some shit. I'm going out and my epitaph is reading- loved food like a damn drug.凸(>.<)凸 
I feel better now


Negative thinking isn't always bad

What is there to say about my life? I'm living at home with parents I rarely see because of work and classes. Classes are so easy, they're very dull( I have a 104 in Math, I suck at math, but the class is just that easy). I'm so bored, I'm teaching myself new stuff so I can actually feel like I'm learning something this semester. It's mostly dealing with herbs and incense. Maybe I'll make some to send to everybody for Christmas along with a big cake- a cookie cake with candy cane trees and a snowman. But it will be all black and orange, and the snowman will be holding his carrot nose like a weapon. "Merry Christmas"will be in bloody icing. Sounds delicious, but I'll have to be selective in who I send it to. Wonder who will see humor in it? I'll have to write it on the list...
Work is work. They had me closing two times this week for the first time in months. They have twice as many night people than day people literally- 3 for day, 9 for night, so I don't know what that was about. Anyhoo, it's too expensive for me to eat there every day even with the 50% off, so I take my own food or starve. It's worked out well though. I'm down a pants size. Yep, though I work in a coffee shop with ice cream and fatty bakery stuff, the weight went poof. I had to say that again because I find it so hard to believe. I expected to be so big by the end of college, especially after moving back home, that friends would have to do an intervention or I would need some surgery just to live.
14 days(excluding today) until Halloween. Get the candy ready!!!Seems to go againsst my goal, but I don't care!!! Besides a variety bag never hurt anybody.


Don't run with that, you'll poke...nevermind *\(~_o)

Yeah, yeah. I suck at updating my blogs. meh. I went to Puerto Rico at the end of the July. It was nice, but I couldn't really speak to anybody. I'll post pictures on my photobucket one of these days.
Started school at CSU and they screwed up a bunch of my paperwork so I had to apply for emergency loan and pay out of pocket. It was and is weird seeing all these people from CHS walking around. I recognize all of them, but they don't remember me. I guess that should be expected, since I've changed a lot, at least in appearance. Schmitz sensei didn't even know me until she heard me speak.
Still working at the coffee shop, thought my parents want me to quit. They seriously doubt it will be in business for too long. I'm actually the last original member of the full time/ morning group. It's me and a new girl, who is very interesting. Our happy arguments entertain the people who come in, but she and I both take it too far for each other on occasion. It keeps things interesting between the rushes. I'll speak more on my adventures some other time.
LATER (^o^)


Greetings on the 4 of July

I finally got paid yesterday night, but can't do anything with it until Tomorrow. Blah..Poor Puck was in my car for so long that part of his hair faded to white and he doesn't have brown eyes anymore. They're a strange milky color. I think he looks cool, but others would most likely find him scarier than he was before. Oh well, he's still my puck.
My sis-in-law is gone. Love her and the kids, but 2 months is just way too long to try and entertain 2 little kids. Although I really do not know why she bothered going back when she's driving back down again at the end of July. My dad is just glad her dog is gone. I think he would've tossed the dog out the kitchen window if he found anymore poop.
I finally was able to get back in contact with DJ and Lexi and we've been hanging out for the past few days which is great because it gets me out of the house. I keep slipping into my bad habit of locking myself into my cave of a room. I still love the silence, but I'm having some trouble readjusting to the kinda lonely way things used to be, before senior year of CHS. It wasn't a bad loneliness, just the comfy rut that comes with constant routine. Let me stop before the flash back swirly-things start to appear.


I've got the shakes from too much coffee

I just finished my first day of training at a coffee shop. They had us try everything made then practice making our own things and drink them, so I've got a wee coffee buzz. I also made some italian cream soda and regular italian soda and rice crispy treats and muffins and cookies and 1 sandwich. The owner people said that we had to at least taste everything so we have a valid opinion of stuff. Tomorrow is the baking practice and Friday is cleaning and review. Then I start working for real on Saturday. Anybody in the Columbus area can come to the family and friends night on Saturday from 6pm to 8, free samples of food and drink.
My nephews have been here for several days and totally screwed up everybody's sleep schedule. They started screaming at 2 in the morning, but everbody is having fun with them. Chocolate, my sis-in-law's dog, has a key phobia because my dad threw a couple of sets near his head.He wasn't aiming for the head, but the floor to teach Chocolate to not go into certain areas.


I'm home

Yes, after hanging out at with my sis-in-law and nephews, I am home again. My job starts on Wednesday. But there's a catch. She came with me. I followed her for a good chunk of the way, which will not happen again. She just weaved thriugh traffic like she was by herself an dI had to go almost a hundred to find her. It finally caught up with her in an area that she wasn't familiar with and got a little lost. I didn't know this, so I went right on my way until she called and was like I don't no this area. I wanted to say well that's what you get, but I didn't. So yeah I'm relaxing at home wondering if I'll ever get away from all the noise. They'll be gone and I'll hear phatom baby cries. So little to do with so much time.


I left my mind under a rock in the back yard. It's now dirty.

I've been at my brother's house for a week now helping my sis in law out with the two kids while my brother is in Iraq. I swear, he's not really over there. He's chillin' in the Bahamas or some place nice playing dominos with the other guys. It's the only way he can call people 20 some odd times a day. Yet he's too busy to call or e-mail his sister. BLAH!
Anyway, I was going to leave for home today to start work tomorrow morning, but the people haven't finished building the place yet, so I don't start until next week. Sis-in-law has shingles( a type of chicken pox for those who don't know) , so she needs some help to take care of the boys anyway. Even if she wasn't ill, she would need some help. Those boys have a lot of energy and Julian is growing his baby teeth. I'm not complaining, she gave me artistic freedom in her kitchen. Her parents are jealous because I've been cooking restaurant type food and desserts. Tonight, I get to try my hand at homemade pizza (^o^)*
I also have managed to cause little bits of havoc, but it's not my fault really. As a rule, if you're going to get a tattoo based off an image from an anime, at least try to find out if it has a real world meaning otherwise don't ask for my opinion or I will call you an idiot and give you the correct meaning. Now the in-law family is all arguing about the stupid thing. They asked!
Well now that I've sweated two pounds in the only room in this house without air conditioning, let me practice tossing pizza around.




Writing from home and staying here for now. I've got the official acceptance from CSU. So I got to hang out with Peter, Josh, and Lindsay at renfest this past weekend. It was fun I got weapons and they're sharp and very shiny (^_^) I like them! Lindsay got her corset, and Peter got an instrument, but I can't remember what it's called. It was fun. Anyway, after all the traveling, I fond out that I have to travel some more as I have been volunteered to help my sis-in-law with my hellish nephews. This time, I'm also taking her friend with me. Hopefully she likes Arabic music, rock and comedy. Hopefully, I can talk to her before Friday, find out anything, and warn her if she likes gospel, country, or hard core rap.



Happy demon with new horns roam GSU campus

I'm writing you from my ITEC final, on which I got a pitiful grade. Oh well. I made my own new website because of this class- irodrig1.tripod.com. Check it out- almost everybody's pic is on their, or will be as soon as I can get the software onto my computer. Renfest news- Lindsay and I are going to try to go either this weekend or next weekend. If I can either get my interview moved to this weekend or in 3 weeks, it'll be next weekend. If not, it'll be this weekend or in 3 weeks. I'm almost done with my costume. I've just been slacking on my leather top. It's hard to sew leather, but the jewelry and tiger print skirt are done. YAY!!*does happy dance* Now I must go and do other stuff, but I expect somebody to e-mail with days for renfesty fun*does dramatic drop on sofa that mysteriously appeared* I must see you people at some point this year.


Everybody cheer for this is an update *\(^o^)/*

So much to say after so long a silence. Lets get started!
I started and finished my PPB, which was where I followed a teacher as she taught her class and practice working with students. Those kids were so sweet and they always asked for me to help them read or work on an assignment. I got to learn and see a lot of different parts to teaching and how to work a class. I'm glad I was with this teacher, who was said to be one of the best in this particular school.
I went to New Jersey for a wedding this last weekend. Getting to go was an adventure in itself. At first I wasn't going to be able to go because of a test that Monday. Then I could go with my brother, then I couldn't go because they didn't have enough room, then I could go if my sis-in-law finished her homework, because they had to go as a family, then I couldn't go because they didn't have the money to put the pets in a kennel. I finally could go, but I had to help my sis-in-law take a test and do homework. Blah! But it was worth it to see the family again. My cousins are so big and smart. Catholic wedding services are long and B-O-R-I-N-G. My poor mom had to wear an ugly dress that only she and the bride's older sister wore. My brother got tipsy at the reception and danced. The trip back took forever because my brother and his family had to take a half an hour break every two hours. I got back to Statesboro at 12 on Monday and still made an 80 on the test. Go Me!!
I had to go home this weekend due to car problems. My poor baby was about to fall apart- new muffler, new barring, a new rim, 2 new tires all in one month. It was sad. Today, my parents decided to go to Renfest and take advantage of the 2 for 1 tickets for opening day. We made the mistake of waiting until 10 a.m. to leave and got stuck in lines for about an hour, but I saw a dark elf, lots of men in kilts, and the tightest tops ever!! Too bad I didn't have a camera. But, I did get new horns that are bigger than my old ones and a new top.
BTW, want to go back the 2nd weekend in May. The 4 packs are still available online, but it's going to be 21.25 a person. It's not a bad price for tickets, food, drink, a game, and a $10 off rental. My parents donated they're house for people who need somewhere to stay. I think I'm going to do that since it's only 45 minutes from the festival grounds. Anyway, those who wish to join know where to find me.



A promise barely kept

Twice in one month, getting better. Next month, 3 updates! Anyway, I'm back in school. Classes are good. Long because they're only once a week, but good. I'm making a different bottom for renfest, out of tiger fur(fake of course). I need to e-mail people to get people to agree on a date for it and reservations for wherever we want to stay. Miss Information won't be fully in until Feb. Who am I kidding? Renfest is April 15-June 4 and all memorial day weekend from 10:30-6. The group tickets aren't up yet, but they have a downloadable coupon for $2 off. I think it would be fun and cheaper if a big crowd goes to camp out. I need new horns(maybe), a tail(definitely), and a top(maybe). Here's the entertainment schedule. Any questions, comments, or issues, you know how to find me. With that out, onto other things, but not today. LATER.


I am alive

Happy 2006 everybody. It doesn't really feel like I've been on this earth for almost 20 years. It also doesn't fell like classes should start back on Monday. What have I been doing this break? The usual, a great deal of thinking, occasionally letting people into the thoughts. Actually I made some new friends here through DJ. Very nice people that let me spend New Years with them while my parents went to my brother's house to help them redecorated. I spent the night sharing a full size bed with 3 other people. The guys should have been in their own room, but people stop caring at 6 in the morning.
Moving a little backward in time, Christmas was spent in the company of family I barely knew and friends of these people. I got everything I wanted and then some. Because of my parent's assistance, I now only need a top for renfest.
Now to the future. I think I'm transferring to CSU next year. If the business plans that Lindsay and I have fail(a nice idea to make and sell home made candles, bath salts, and soaps), then I will definitely be going to CSU in the fall. I just can't afford it anymore.
P.S. I'll try to update more than once a month.